Mother Bear's Cave

Am I Beautiful?

2011-08-07T01:51:00.002+08:00

Am I beautiful?

What brought about this question was something that somebody said to me tonight. What actually happened was that she first asked me if I had any boyfriend before. Then this was followed by why I did not get married. What came next was something that gave me mixed reactions. I didn't know whether to laugh, be annoyed, feel insulted or just be amused.

I was advised by a fifteen year old girl to have a make-over in order to land a husband. LOL. As if I wanted one.

I never claimed to be a ravishing beauty. But when given such an advice by somebody who lives in a country where cosmetic surgery is pretty common even among teenagers, I wondered what is considered beautiful nowadays by young people. Does it constitute having double eyelids, a V-line face, a very slim body and fair skin? I guess, if the public is bombarded by such images as icons of beauty then I can truly understand why it become a standard for them.

The concept of physical beauty varies. What may be considered beautiful in one country may seem unattractive in another place. The elongated necks of the women is associated with beauty in the Karen tribe but this may seem strange to people from other nations. In the pursuit of beauty, many men and women subject themselves procedures which sometimes become detrimental to their health.

I dare say though that real beauty is something which radiates from the within. It is produced by the goodness emanating from a pure heart.

March On, Defenders of Human Rights!

2010-12-09T17:25:00.000+08:00

December 10 marks the annual celebration of the International Human Rights Day. This year's theme focuses on the recognition of the efforts done by human rights defenders who act to end discrimination.

Human rights defenders are people who, in their personal capacity, worked so hard to put an end to a seemingly endless violations against the basic human rights of people all over the world. They gave voice to the plight of victims of oppression and discrimination who have become mute due to fear of reprisals. They fought for the rights of the victims of violence. They have become the faces of justice.

Who and where are they - these human rights defenders? They can be ordinary people just like you and me. They can be somebody whose names are recognizable worldwide. They can be persons whom you meet in your daily life. They can be anywhere - in the countryside, the big cities, in a developed country or in the third world.

What makes a person a defender of human rights? What sets them apart from the rest of the populace? The reason is not that they are better educated or wealthier than the others but it is because they made a decision to take action. In a seemingly indifferent world, the defenders of human rights chose to be concerned and involved in the battle for the protection of the rights inherent in each human being.

Yes! March on, defenders of human rights. We salute you.

On Soap Opera

2010-08-19T23:40:00.001+08:00

Soap operas have become a staple fare in the lives of a lot of people. It seems like they are living vicariously through the lives of the characters. It is also possible that many can relate to story. Situations are so exaggerated in the soap operas. It may also be that some of the audience feel a bit better when they watch these shows because it seems that their lives are better compared with the often chaotic ones of the characters. It may also be that they can find the excitement that they wish for in their lives in those of the characters. One thing though is that these shows can be very engaging and so addictive.

Decisions...

2010-07-10T22:34:00.003+08:00

I am at a loss.

I am not sure if this can be considered as a midlife crisis or not. I hold two jobs and have another one waiting for me. Now, the question is if I leave my day job for another one. The current one is fast-paced and challenging but the turn-over is really frequent. The one waiting for my decision is a bit more laid back and stable. The pay's almost the same.

I guess I have the weekend to think about the various pro's and cons and then that's it for me...decision time. I dread doing that.

Finally...

2010-07-05T23:24:00.001+08:00

Yes, I finally got to watch 2 World Cup matches last weekend. It was fun and heartwarming.

I can remember a line regarding the agony of defeat when I saw a certain player cry because his team lost. At the same time, I can feel the energy emanating from the cheers of the audience. I also got to see the exultant faces of the winners.

The one that I got to see till the end was the game between Ghana and Uruguay. I also got to see the first part of the Germany-Argentina match but I fell asleep and never got to finish the game. I really wanted to check out the other games but can't because of my very heavy work schedule.

I just wish though that an Asian team would have made it but that's just wishful thinking on my part.

Goodbye, 2009...

2009-12-31T17:50:00.002+08:00

True enough, there are many ways of celebrating new year. The traditions in most countries in Asia are very similar to that of the Chinese.

In our case, the new year’s celebration and some of the things that we do and prepare have been greatly influenced by the Chinese. They have taken a part of their own local custom and brought it to the Philippines where more than a million Filipino-Chinese live. Then the those practices became wide-spread. For example, people set off firecrackers during that night because the noise that it makes is said to drive the negative spirits away. Then 12 round-shaped fruits are prepared.Red colored clothes are worn.

These practices are done in the hope of inviting good luck for the new year.

Thanks, my friend...

2009-12-29T05:55:00.001+08:00

We’ve often talked about dreams and just now I remembered a quotation which is very much related to it. It says that we should let go of our idealism for without it we are nothing. Just like dreams, if we give it up, we don’t have anything to look forward to - no goals, no direction, no source of inspiration.

As we grow older, we become more cynical and jaded. We become skeptics. We have overlooked so many essential facets of life. It is true that there are negative forces around us but we shouldn’t also forget that there’s a lot of goodness in the world.

It will be another challenging year for all of us. Let us keep our fingers crossed and pray for the best.

I am glad that I met you.

Life is...

2009-12-28T03:44:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, we feel that we have done everything that we can in order to do or get something but we fall short of our expectations. Life is not as we expect it. Just like you, this year was also very challenging to me due to some health and personal difficulties. I felt that I was not in control of my life. It was a struggle because sometimes, I’d feel depressed. The only saving grace is my relationship with my friends and fellow volunteers. They continue to encourage and inspire me. They do not let me give up even during the times when I’d feel so down. They told me that it is just a phase because of the hormonal changes that I’m experiencing. I can find happiness and the strength in the people whom I work with and serve in the community because despite the hard times, they are very resilient. Being positive is very important especially if we are faced with a lot of challenges. Life is full of ups and downs and the idea of going with the flow I think is much better than just feeling down and in the dumps. This year was very challenging and knowing that there is hope for the future can always spur us to move on and forge ahead. Just like in your case, things will be better and if you continue to persevere and believe in your dreams, ultimately you will be able to achieve it. A phrase which comes to my mind is a slogan from a show which goes this way: Dream, Believe, Survive! I believe that you can do it.

On Moods

2009-06-10T09:25:00.001+08:00

My emotions can be likened to a rollercoaster these past few months. It was like everything piled up and I’d burst out crying. It is said that this situation may be due to the hormonal changes in our body and I think this is especially true with me. I really think my hormones have really gone askew. I’d have crying jags and sometimes when somebody I know would cry because of some misfortunes or difficulties, tears would slowly trickle down my cheek. I rarely got into the self-pity mode when I was younger but now there are times when I’d do. After a good cry, things felt better. Crying can release tension and contained emotion. I’ve learned not to bottle up my emotions too much. I’d rather have a healthy cry. I just wish that I wouldn’t have puffy, red eyes and stuffy nose after that though.

On Dreams Again...Mine

2009-06-09T02:14:00.003+08:00

Last Saturday night or was it early morning, I had a very vivid dream which left me feeling restless. I'm not sure if it can be considered as lucid dreaming.

Anyway, in my dream I saw other women working in the same place where I do and I mean in the same room. There's this one woman who was sitting in front of the pc in cubicle 4 and it seems that I was giving her some assistance. It was like I was walking her through the process but I had that niggling feeling that they'll be sharing the same workplace. I didn't see any of my real co-workers though. Then a thought entered my mind...maybe they're out to replace us. The feeling of unease continued and even if I was able to sleep again, it was a restless one. Then just this noontime, I discovered that the same cubicle and pc that I saw in my dream got wet due to some leakage.

Was my dream telling me something?

On Gloomy Weather

2009-06-08T11:06:00.002+08:00

I have never been a fan of gloomy weather. It's something that we don't necessarily have a choice. It's either we have it or we don't. This past few days, the weather has been so gloomy and unpredictable. it brings to mind the belief that weather affects a person's mood.

I am not sure though if it's true or not. One thing that I am sure of is that when we have this kind of weather, I'd rather curl up in a bed with a good book. Then if rain truly comes, then the sound of the raindrops would lull me to sleep. Now that would even be better if that happens on a weekend when I do not have anything to do.

Actually, that's what I did yesterday.

On Sleeping In During Weekends

2009-06-07T04:43:00.004+08:00

Weekends are days I always look forward to because of several reasons.

First and foremost, these are the days when I get to wake up late. That is if our volunteer organization doesn't have activities lined up. Sleep is a luxury for me. My job requires me to stay up very late at night and sometimes up to the wee hours of the morning. Thus, I savor the experience of sleeping for more than eight hours on weekends.

My room mates (who also belong to the same organization that I do) and I usually sleep until noontime or until someone would get up earlier because of hunger and pester the others to wake just to have company for breakfast cum lunch. After which, it's back to sleep or reading or surfing the net for us.

That's it for now and I'm off to bed again. I slept earlier and just woke up to post something.

On Sports

2009-06-06T02:23:00.001+08:00

Sports is a worthwhile activity for kids and adults. Not only do they exercise but they also get to gain more friends. The camaraderie between team mates is something which goes beyond just playing. It is playing as a team or having team work. It is not playing against each other but with each other.

For the family, indulging in sports strengthens the bond of kinship. It provides the family members with an opportunity to interact and relate more deeply with each other. It gives them a chance to spend quality time together.

Yes, sports may also mean competition. Individuals do compete with others but the real competition would be in trying to outperform themselves always. It is competing with the self and not with another person.

On Impressions

2009-06-03T01:19:00.000+08:00

Laughter for me is the best medicine. I try to smile and laugh as often as possible. I was too serious when I was young and I heard some feedback that I looked aloof. They said that I was such a grouch. After that, I tried to make a concerted effort to make myself as amiable and approachable as possible. I took things too seriously.

I had a paradigm shift.

Nowadays, I try to look for the positive in everything...situations and people. I learned to let go of things which I cannot control. Also I learned that people in our lives come and go so we have to relish whatever time we have with them. I have also learned to be more open and appreciative of people around me. Furthermore, I am not so hesitant now to show my affection.

On Dreams Still

2009-06-02T11:14:00.001+08:00

So you have been dreaming again. It might be that these disturbing dreams are part of your subconscious and you are at a crossroad right now. It might be that there are things that you really desire but you just feel that you cannot have it because of certain reasons not of your own choice. Such situations then are acted out in your dreams. It might also be that your subconscious is trying to send you a message which will ultimately be revealed fully later in your life. Anyway, I hope that you’ll know exactly what it is.

On Some Water Creatures

2009-06-01T10:48:00.002+08:00

It has been more than a month since I last went near the beach or the sea. The last time I stayed in a mangrove resort. During high tide, the water would reach the floor of the cottage where we stayed but if it’s low tide, it’s like a wide expanse of swampy area. The water becomes so shallow that we can even walk on it and get to see or catch some fish. Usually, we do that in the early mornings or late afternoons. Some of the fish would burrow under the ground and would come out again if it’s high tide. It’s not only different kinds of fish that we found but also crabs, a tortoise, a stray porpoise and several other creatures. There was also a man-made fishpond where we can get some milkfish. Fish taste better if it’s really fresh. Catfish on the other hand is different for most of it thrives on freshwater. It can be small like an baby’s arm but it can also grow to a gigantic size. It is usually black-colored and has barbels (the whisker-like thing ) on its chin which makes it look like a cat. It can be grilled or fried. In Malaysia, they cook it with coconut milk and spices. It tastes good, too.

On Death

2009-05-31T00:33:00.002+08:00

Death seems so final and is very hard to take especially for those who are very close to the deceased person. Those who are left behind go through the process of denial, then anger & blaming, then on to acceptance. Finally the healing starts. Sometimes, there is that question of whether they could have done something to prevent it. In the end though, it has to be accepted that there are things which are beyond control. They will still be remembered in the hearts of the people who care for them. The grieving process will be difficult and may be a long one but it has to start somewhere.

On Dreams

2009-05-29T23:51:00.001+08:00

People dream because of a number of reasons. Some because they have some unresolved issues or concerns while others dream because of stress. It is said that we act out in our dreams our unfulfilled desires. There is also a contention that even fears and negative emotions may find its way into our dreams. I have also heard that there are people who experience lucid dreaming. This happens when one is half awake and can control in a way what transpires in the dream.

Growing Taller

2009-05-27T10:48:00.000+08:00

There are times when I wish I were taller especially when I have to get something from the upper levels of the cabinets or when I go buy some things from the grocery store and it’s located in the upper portion of the shelves. Augh! I have to wait for somebody whom I could ask to get it for me or I have to use a ladder or a chair just so I can reach it. So even if I can get those special shoes, it would be virtually useless because of my age. In your case, you have a long way to go. You’re still young and you’ve got several more years to grow taller. I looked it up again on the net and yes, under the big toe, there’s a certain spot where once pressed stimulate the pituitary gland. This promotes growth. So, if that would be done more often then there will really be higher chances of you reaching or even surpassing 180 centimeters.

Sweatshops

2009-05-14T04:02:00.001+08:00

Sweatshops are fairly common in the past in almost all countries especially during the Industrial Revolution. People from the countryside flocked to the cities in search of a better life. The reality was contrary to their expectations. Workers are housed in places which can be described as befitting animals. Shelter and safe workplaces were in dire need. Various maladies, both physical and social, afflicted thousands of people. There were those who rose above the situation and attained a certain degree of success but the majority was left in a quagmire of misery. Organizations and unions were formed to address the social ills including the concerns of the workers.

Yes, this might have happened in the past century but these conditions can still be found in the Third World. In some cases, sweatshops also exist in some so-called developed countries. Workers are still exploited. They still work long hours with low pay in unhealthy workplaces. Discrimination and abuse are still prevalent. Thus, the continuing existence and the strengthening of labor unions.

The Challenges of Public Speaking

2009-05-09T01:29:00.001+08:00

Speaking in public or in front of an audience is something scary for a large percentage of people. There have been several studies regarding this issue. This usually happens when the speaker is not very confident with his communication skills or with his mastery of the topic that he is supposed to deliver. For some, just the mere thought of having several pairs of eyes focused on them can already make them sweat. Being under public scrutiny is can cause terror amongst ordinary people.
A healthy amount of tension or stress can help the individual become a better speaker but if it becomes a cause of him stuttering/stammering, then it becomes unhealthy. It really is difficult at first but once speaking in public has been done several times, it becomes easier.
Confidence is one factor which can greatly affect its outcome. Overcome fear and nervousness. In speaking before the audience, look for a friendly face and imagine that you are talking to him. Fully understand and master the topic. Do not just memorize because once a word or phrase is forgotten, one may not be able to go on. Smile. The audience will react positively to a smile.

On Job Interviews

2009-05-07T15:29:00.001+08:00

Job interviews are considered as crucial stages in one’s career. It can mean rejection or acceptance. The best way to handle one is to be prepared. The individual can come up with probable questions and answers. This way he will not appear to be totally clueless.

One should search for information about the company since most of the time, the questions given during the interview will be related to the company and the position applied for.

During the interview proper, one should exude confidence. If possible, a portfolio with resume is brought together with a pen and paper just in case. Be punctual and stay calm. Smile.

In terms of probable questions, the interviewers may ask about the individual’s work history, personal capabilities and future plans. One should just be ready to answer almost any question with grace and wit.

Tests

2009-05-07T00:46:00.003+08:00

English tests such as TOEIC can be very daunting for non-native speakers. One thing that we, as non native speakers, can do though is to try and do our very best to pass it. Self-confidence is very important but for us to be confident we have to master several skills. For reading comprehension, exposure and constant reading of English materials are recommended. Read books, magazines, etc. everyday. Do not translate word per word but rather focus on the whole message that is being conveyed. A certain word may be used in a different manner and might cause confusion if it is translated as is. In speaking and writing, a wide vocabulary is also a must. Appropriate words should be used to give a much better description of a certain object or situation. It might be that a certain word can be used but another word might be more apt. With a better vocabulary, an individual can even be more eloquent.

The Secret To Happiness?

2009-04-28T09:13:00.002+08:00

I have not seen the movie, “The Secret” and I just read some excerpts from the book. One friend whom I worked with before when we conducted personal enhancement training workshops was the one who told me about that book. I do agree in a way with it because I believe that the mind is really very powerful. Having a positive outlook in life is good but this should be balanced with reality. We do not have to be exactly like Pollyanna, another character who always sees the brighter side of life. In the book Pollyanna, one line goes this way:

“When you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will.”

I’d rather look for the best in everyone and in every situation. There are situations which are beyond our control but our reactions to these are within our hands. If we just react immediately then we totally lose control of our emotions. We lose. This one we learned from another book, the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey. It is also a self-help book like The Secret. I really like it. I have come to a point wherein I felt that “sharpening the saw” and “smelling the flowers” are vital. I do not want to look back in my life and find it empty…devoid of relationships and meaning.

Another cliché: “If you’re given lemons, make lemonade.”

Life is what we make it. If a person wants to be miserable then it’s a choice that he makes. I choose to be happy despite all the difficulties in life. Where can I find true peace and happiness? For me, the answer is within myself.

Relationships

2008-07-20T23:48:00.002+08:00

Relationships are quite complicated but still it has its advantages. I read somewhere that there are several factors which should be considered in relationships...maturity level, social standing, intellectual capacity, culture, etc. I agree that all of these are to be noted in getting into a relationship. Compatibility counts as well as the capacity to compliment each other. Though there is also another saying stating that opposites attract but I guess it depends largely on the people involved. I also believe that if you feel that relationship is worth fighting for, then, go on and do what you believe is best to nurture it.

Responsibilty

2008-07-20T23:46:00.001+08:00

Everything that we do has a rippling effect. Sometimes we feel that we are free to do what we want without thinking of the consequences. We just want to vent whatever emotions we feel to the point that we become unaware of its effect on other people. This is most especially true if people look up to us. I worked with young people for quite a long time and this has made me very careful with my actions and words. I just felt that I have to be responsible for my actions and I believe it has stood me in good stead.

Summer Fun

2008-07-09T00:37:00.003+08:00

Summer has started in Korea. There are those who are overjoyed with the arrival of this season. It means less bulky clothes, holiday in other places, ice creams, trips to the beach, hanging out with friends or just the fact that school's out. There are also those who would rather have the cooler seasons but well, it's to each his own. Summer is to be valued even just for the sunny days that it brings. Sweltering heat aside, summer is a time to have fun, fun and fun.

Joys Of Friendship

2008-07-04T01:09:00.003+08:00

Time out with friends is an enjoyable way to spend our weekend. The joy that friendship brings is something to behold. In my case, I have done so many things and sometimes have to do without something just for the sake of friendship. Sometimes, the relationship might become rocky but if there is that measure of respect for each other then the friendship shall prevail. I am very glad that I have new and old friends whose presence enhanced my life and I also hope that in turn, I may have touched theirs also.

Traditional Or Modern

2008-07-04T01:07:00.002+08:00

Each country has its own particular culture. Engagement and weddings are ceremonies which may be considered as a dynamic part of our culture. With the evolution of our society comes the constant change in its cultural make-up. Rites such as weddings are still being practiced but there is a marked preference nowadays for modern and less costly celebrations as opposed to having a traditional one. This choice, of course, manifests the economic difficulty of the common people.

Friendship

2008-07-04T00:58:00.003+08:00

Friendship goes beyond boundaries and time. Most of our treasured are those whom we grew up with and those who shared our childhood. There is a different kind of relationship with them that transcends distance and age. When we are with them, we are reminded of the olden times when we were still carefree kids and throughout the difficult and oftentimes confusing adolescence. But wherever our friends may be, they are precious and valuable.

Whine? No! Do Something

2008-07-04T00:55:00.002+08:00

Today's discussion was very interesting. Social problems have emerged left and right nowadays. Most of these problems have global as well as domestic effects. There are those who have taken a more proactive stance by looking for solutions while others are just contented with whining and complaining. Maybe if individuals as well as institutions/company's would evaluate their actions and the possible consequences of such, then risks and crisis can be preempted and avoided.

HoldingOn

2008-07-04T00:52:00.001+08:00

A lot of problems emerged due to the strike conducted by people from multi-sectoral groups. The price of oil has gone up and this event affected the lives of the people not only in Korea but all over the world. This is but just one problem. There were also natural calamities like the earthquakes in Japan and China and the cyclone in Myanmar. Disasters both natural and man-made plagued people all over the world. These events will ultimately test the strength of the people and the nations affected. Overcoming these may be difficult but in the end, I am sure that there will be a recovery and much stronger nations will emerge.

Family Travels

2008-07-04T00:48:00.001+08:00

Holidays give such joy to families who can have another opportunity to spend their free time together. Traveling is just but one activity that a family can do during vacation. Some go to other countries while others would rather explore the domestic turf. But any which way, traveling with family members is fun. It can also be very informative especially if historical places are visited. It can also be enlightening because one can be exposed to the culture of the people living in a specific area.